When the day comes that I will finally be confident enough in my work, I will look back on this time and remember how it was all part of the process.
When that day comes when I am finally good enough to be called “good”, God help me to never be “too good” for those who are still trying.
When that day comes when my goals and my skills are finally coming together, I hope to feel fulfilled enough to finally stop selling myself short and unsatisfied enough to stay hungry and keep learning.
But for now… I’ll be pushing on.
So I got engaged last month. Part of me has yet to let it sink in, but most of me doesn’t really feel that different. This has always been the plan for years, so the proposal kinda just made it official.
I hit the ground running with the planning. Obviously, I’m not the sort of the girl who’s had her big day visualized since childhood, so all of that just came spilling out in the last few weeks. For the record, I’m pretty proud of how fast and efficient everything has been going so far. Not bad for someone who’s totally new at this. (And P.S. I don’t know how brides ever survived without Pinterest.)
Odin has been a solid partner throughout all of this – letting me have creative freedom (within reason and budget), giving his input when I need it, helping me contact suppliers, updating our Google Docs files, and even putting his foot down on some areas. Above all that, we’re always praying together, which lets me know that we’re going to be okay no matter what as long as we have God at the center of our relationship.
We’ve got nine months left and we’re enjoying and taking in every day slowly despite the hectic schedule we’ll be having this summer. I’m also going on a solo trip next month as a “one last” before I get hitched. It’s eight days of not having to work or plan or put on makeup or whatever. Just me, the sea and a good book.
So many things to look forward to in the coming months! I just hope it all doesn’t go by so fast.
It hasn’t quite sunken in yet. Both our lives are going to change forever, and while huge, life-altering decisions usually leave me with anxiety attacks, I have never felt calmer in my life. I have never been so sure of anything.
Here’s to the rest of our lives, love.
Ever have something beautiful choke the life out of you?
Being surrounded by so much concrete, crowds and chaos can only last me so long. I feel like I’m going mad sometimes, like my soul is clawing its way out of my body to fly somewhere far away to be with sand, waves and palm trees.
It won’t be long now. This summer will be mine, I swear it.